


In Which Darth Vader Is Obsessed With Drake And Josh

by JustBeStill



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars: Rise of Empire Era - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, Funny, Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:08:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25767940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustBeStill/pseuds/JustBeStill
Summary: Darth Vader has a bad day and takes it out on Palpatine.
Kudos: 6





	In Which Darth Vader Is Obsessed With Drake And Josh

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ohgodmyeyes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohgodmyeyes/gifts).



Palpatine burst into Vader's chambers. "There you are, I've been looking for you!"

"AHHHH I WASN'T DOING ANYTHING!!" Vader screamed as he stood up. His helmet was off, exposing his scarred face.

Palpatine looked at him strangely. "I... never said you were. Nevermind that, I need you to find the Rebel base! I know they have like a hundred more backup bases!"

"I'm... a bit busy right now..." Vader said.

Palpatine noticed he was holding a datapad with a show playing on it. He groaned and rubbed at his temples. "Vader, are you watching Drake and Josh again? You know what that show does to you!"

"SHUT UP, YOU DUMB BOOB!" Vader yelled at him, running out of the room. "You give me headaches! HEADACHES!!"

He noticed a Stormtrooper was staring at him. "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, STEVE??? Go make yourself useful and get me some tacos! YOU'RE SUCH A BOOB, STEVE!!"

Steve shrugged his shoulders and continued walking.

Vader grabbed a boiling pot of spaghetti and threw it at the Stormtrooper. "Whatever! Your cooking sucks, anyway! BOOB!"

The Emperor sighed. "Not this again. Vader, do I have to cut you off? You're spending WAY too much time in here watching that drivel." 

Vader gasped. "Drake and Josh is NOT drivel, Master! It's a very entertaining show filled with endless potential!" He turned away. "Now leave me alone! I have to see what Megan's latest prank is! It might give me some ideas for torturing the Rebels."

Palpatine rushed over and snatched the holo-pad from his apprentice. "No more Drake and Josh until you find the Rebel base! I am sick of this new attitude of yours, and I want the old Vader back!"

Vader mumbled something and angrily picked up his helmet, placing it back on his head. "Fine! But when I get back, you better let me watch it for the rest of the evening!"

"MAKE SURE YOU KILL THEM ALL, LORD VADER!" Palpatine yelled after him. "IF THERE IS A SINGLE SURVIVOR, YOU LOSE DRAKE AND JOSH PRIVALEGES FOR A WHOLE WEEK!"

"YEAH, YEAH, WHATEVER!" Vader said back to him from down the hall. Another Stormtrooper passed the armored Sith, and Vader shoved them over the railing on his way past. The Stormtrooper screamed as he fell down into the pit.

The Emperor seethed. "THAT'S IT, NO MORE HOLO PRIVELAGES FOR THE REST OF THE DAY!"

"He said I needed to lighten up, Master!" Vader argued. "He deserved to be killed for that!"

"Well, I agree with him!" Palpatine said in an annoyed tone. "You're being such a buzzkill right now!"

"But Master, I'm just EXPRESSING my emotions!"

"I can't have you killing my soldiers, even if they are basically brainwashed droids! That armor is very expensive to make!"

"What was that?" Vader said. "I can't hear you over the sound of how MEAN you are!"

Palpatine groaned as Vader walked away. "I have got to inflict stricter punishments..."


End file.
